Empty and Make Room
I recently noticed in myself a feeling of depletion and tiredness. I realized that I had unconsciously slid back into doing (a very easy thing to do when you are filled with loads of creative ideas and passionate about sharing what you know). This is something that frequently happens when we do not say no to the endless perceived demands or needs of others. It is also an easy thing to do when we do not make a conscious choice to put ourselves first.
I remember years ago having a card reading with a Native American deck. I have never forgotten the card that represented the wisdom of the grandmothers—this card “Empty and Make Room” was an image for letting go of those things that no longer serve us and in doing so make space for those things that do. Letting go of doing creates the space to embrace extreme self care. This is a choice that serves us very well when we make it.
While traveling to Hawaii I was again reminded of this principle. The flight attendants instructions during the safety announcements are to put our oxygen mask on first before helping others. Yet most of us fail to take that simple advice for our lives. Our conditioning has us caring for others instead of ourselves and often will have us feeling that it is not ok to put ourselves first, perhaps even selfish to do so.
If we are to be the best we can be and live our best lives we must learn to choose to put ourselves and our needs first. By needs I am not talking about the behaviors or drivers of action. Here I am speaking about the things that nurture us like quiet, space, time for relaxation, or play.
Extreme self care is the state in us when we feel extremely well cared for. How simple is that? Extreme self care expects us to take great care of ourselves and by doing so creates reserves in all areas of our lives. Reserves allow us to feel better and to be at choice in our response to others. Reserves reduce our reactivity as well. Extreme self care allows us to create an environment where we can take better care of anyone who needs it, if that is what we choose to do.
Often our egos or minds will have us pleasing others and meeting the demands of others at the expense of our well being. We can easily burn ourselves out doing and have little to nothing left to share with ourselves or with those we love who are important to us. When you think about all that you feel you should be doing, ask yourself how this activity supports you. Often, simply staying present to the feeling that drives the desire to do will allow you to make a different choice. If you are aware of overdoing in your life it is time to choose extreme self care for yourself!
What would it feel like to know you were extremely well cared for? How would you know you are taking extremely good care of yourself? The feeling of depletions, tiredness and often depression would be replaced by a wonderful consistent sense of well being.
Have you ever felt extremely well cared for even for a moment? Have you ever chosen to “do” when you knew the best thing for you was rest, being and self care? Do you feel you deserve to feel extremely well cared for?
Extreme self care is a choice. What would stop you from choosing this for yourself?
Begin today to develop the self care muscles of your being by becoming aware of the energy that drives you to do. Be willing to ask yourself the following questions:
What do I fear that would cause me to choose to do something for others at the expense of my well being?
Who wouldn’t like it if I said no to doing?
Choose today to become aware of what you are sensing and begin to make conscious choices that perfectly support your well being. Here is the perfect intention to support this choice:
I choose always to take extremely good care of myself.